Safety
If you are in immediate danger,
call 911
Quick Exit From Site
(if you need to make a quick exit out of this site, CLICK THIS LINK)
Safety Plan:
American Bar Association: Domestic Violence Safety Plan- Criminal Proceedings
Personalized Safety Plan
NCADV- Protect Yourself
Devising a Safety Plan- ATASK
Remember: Document the abuse. Keep a journal of incidents including dates, times, and the nature of the attack. Keep this journal in a safe place, maybe a friend’s home. Keep medical records if you have sustained injuries.
If you are still in a relationship/ in close personal quarters with an attacker, make sure you have another place to stay if you fear another assault.
Stay with a friend or a relative. Make them aware of the situation. Let your coworkers know of the abuse. Let them know that your attacker should not be in your workplace and to call the police if he or she is there. If you have children, alert their school. Let them know that your attacker should not be on school grounds.
Keep an emergency bag in case you flee from the attacker. Some things to include:
- Important documents for yourself (and your children if you have them), birth certificates, social security cards, passports, school id’s, your license, medical insurance cards, restraining order
- Financial information: bank information (in case you have to close your account or get funds before your attacker can close the account), home-ownership certificate, income statements
- Numbers/directions to local police departments and shelters
If you are fleeing from an attacker, be sure to stay with someone you trust. YOU MUST LET YOUR FRIENDS/RELATIVES KNOW WHAT HAS HAPPENED. You can’t do this alone; and you cannot be alone.
If you have not already filed a restraining order against your attacker, do it as soon as possible. Change your phone number and screen your calls. Change your locks. If you wish to stay home, make sure a trusted friend or relative stays with you. Be alert and ready in case the attacker comes to your home. Call the police immediately if this happens.
Restraining Order:
Massachusetts 209A- How to File an Abuse Prevention Order
You can file a restraining order if nothing has happened, but you fear an attack.
The fastest way to obtain a restraining order is by calling the police, reporting the abuse, and requesting the order.
You can also obtain a restraining order at your local family court.
- Go to the court
- Request the documents necessary to file the order
- Fill out all information in the documents
- All personal information for yourself (and children if you have them)
- All information about the abuse
- Include all details you can remember
- Be sure to include any evidence of the abuse by pictures, a log, witnesses, medical records
- In the case of sexual assault/rape, be sure to include anything that has the attackers semen—used condom, clothing
- Did you scratch the attacker?
- Were there any hairs left behind?
- To ensure the safety of your children, file orders for them as well
- Make sure to sign and date the documents and give them back to the court personnel
If you can afford a lawyer, hire one and make them aware of the situation.
For free, confidential LEGAL advice and counsel, call Abuse Victim Hotline, Inc. at 1-866-662-4535
Internet Safety:
Broken Spirits Network- Internet Security
An abuser can easily track anything you do on the internet, WebPages you’ve viewed, emails you’ve sent, etc. There is no way to completely erase internet usage on a computer. But there are some things you can do to protect yourself.
Email Safety:
- If you have emails to/from someone who may anger your attacker, or if you have emails from a hotline or advocacy service and your attacker has access to your accounts, DELETE THESE EMAILS.
- If your attacker does not have access to your email inbox/outbox, but is sending you threats via email/chats, do not delete these. They could be valuable later in your healing process. They could be used as evidence to prosecute your attacker.
- Set up a new email account:
- Do not use information about yourself for your login name- do not use any personal information that an attacker may memorize
- Some email services that are very user friendly, and easy to set up.
Web-page Safety:
How to Clear Some Easily Accessible & Traceable Internet Files on your Computer
( Windows & Mac Instructions )
- Clear your cookies/internet files:
- For windows systems, go to your Start Menu then scroll up to Control Panel
- Go to the file that says Internet Options
- In the middle of the window, there is an option Delete Files, click that
- Then click Delete Cookies
- Then click Delete History (scroll down for an alternative way to clear your web history)
Again, there is no way to delete all of your internet activity from your computer. If you do not wish someone to see what you are doing online, try using a friend’s computer or a computer at your local library.
- If you are afraid your attacker will look through your internet files, make sure to delete certain sites from your internet history. There is usually a button at the top of every web browser that says, “History.” Click that, and delete the sites you don’t want anyone to see. It may not be a good idea to completely clear your history. This could make an attacker suspicious.
An example of the History button on Internet Explorer
